I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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