Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
