yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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