Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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