He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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