After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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