I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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