You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
how can u be prego again
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
