I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
