I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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