This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
