i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Randomize
