At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
