"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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