So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
It's never too late to be topless.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
