The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
