Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Im part way to drunk.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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