oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
