If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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