No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
found the other keg... it's in the tree
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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