Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize