After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
