how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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