Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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