this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
