And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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