Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
