break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
