Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
