they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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