love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
