We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
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Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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