I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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