He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
