And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
