this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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