Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Randomize