I got chris browned last night
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
