Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
