I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
