I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Randomize
