He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
so much tequila, so little girl.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
