Old men and throwing up are my life now.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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