OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
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