It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
All I want is dick and wine.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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