So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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