i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
