I love black thongs
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I need water and some morals
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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