Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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