i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
